How slow can I go....

Cameo and I enjoyed our 'riding' session today,with the thoughts uppermost in my mind-put the relationship first -and read the horsenality that is there right now.
I have squashed my dreams of cross country and jumping firmly to the back of my mind for the moment. What is the point if she is not consistently relaxed when just walking??

So we slowly left the others eating hay - (she thrust her nose into the halter again so must be going ok)and ambled up the hill, noticing thresholds and waiting til they were gone. Cam was pleased to find yummy hay waiting for her while I brushed her!! Every so often she reached out with her nose while munching, and touched something -the fence post, the bareback pad,the blue and white towel,the carrot stick then touched me - she was really thinking but not 100% relaxed. I put the bareback pad on and we did driving from Z3 to barrels, cones etc for a few minutes, with the odd treat here and there. I unthinkingly scratched my head, inadvertently lifting my carrot stick,and she immediately sidewaysed towards me - yay!! How perceptive... would I have noticed if I hadn't been trying to go so slow?? We had some lateral flexion practice -oooooohhhh stroke 6 times on the nearside - which hadn't been so good -no snatching back....and just as good the other side.

So I sat on the fence and lifted my arm, up she 'taxied' -not quite straight but pretty good. I got on and we sat,as she was a little bracey. After a few minutes of porky on the poll she lowered her head and let her breath go. We played with throwing the rope over (I was riding with one rein) Then for no reason I could see, her head was immediately up again (don't think it was me as her focus was to the trees) and she was stary. I now feel confident enough to have a play with some of these episodes while onboard, so just experimented with lateral flexion-50:50 chance, and to see what leadership I had in what for her was a not entirely comfortable situation. I asked so softly on the easier side ....and I got a soft response, and chewing...wow another first!! She always before would brace and not allow any bend. We sat and sat and after a few minutes she shook her head and neck - she doesn't do this often and put her head down.
We moved off and just practised disengaging, indirect rein, direct rein,as slow and softly as I could with the lowest phases I could,starting with weight and body and ending with rein (if I needed it) it really feels like going back to the beginning but it is SO much better than before. Often I didn't need to use the rein(and had no carrot stick asI didn't want to 'make' her) We backed, sidewaysed, turn on the hq all with no reins - SO pleased!! All very slowly but she was with me all the time, every so often turning her head and touching my leg -didn't realise just how much she offered til writing it now...
We had to stay in her 'safe' end of the arena and she wasn't as soft or forward going as the other night, but we consistently got 6 strokes of the face either side - would have been pleased with that without all the other stuff.
Although it feels as if we have regressed -after all we were doing canter passenger 2 years ago,but on a bracey tense unhappy horse. I am sure it is the right thing to do though - fill in the gaps from the beginning.

What made it even better was that the others were fine -last time Cam went out of sight Rafiki got quite right brained.
Hope I can get some more 'riding' in the next few days - I'm keeping up with the plan I'd written so far. Is early days,but trying to put into practice the mental techniques I've recently learned -it really helps!

This session she shook her head/neck 3 times and finally relaxed and put her head down so I immediately got off and she licked and chewed for several minutes -thought she was never going to stop!!